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Feeling very teary

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Feeling very teary

Post by Lucie83 on Thu Aug 28, 2014 5:15 pm

Good Afternoon All,

Hope everyone is having a good Thurs, it's nearly Fri  cheers 

Have been busy this week and my husband managed to convince me to get my 2 little ones a kitten each, so I have been occupied with children and kittens this week.

I don't have anything to say today about HPTH but just wanted to have a little venting session as been feeling very teary the past couple of days and I don't know why. I was discussing something with my husband today and I felt like I was going to burst into tears. I've noticed I have become anxious in the past few months and I am constantly worrying about something, mainly health issues tbh. I've turned into someone I wasn't, I just cannot switch my mind off health issues, I read far too much on the internet about things I shouldn't and I have to hold my hands up, I'm constantly worrying about what the future holds but I don't know why  Embarassed  Don't get me wrong I'm not depressed or anything but I'm a stay at home parent and I think I have too much time on my hands (if that makes sense) or should I say I have too much alone time and Google has become my friend. I know that sounds crazy but I am driving myself mad. I don't want to talk to a GP about this as I know what they will say, I don't want depression pills as I know I'm not depressed, just feel like anxiety is takin over and if anyone has any relaxation tips or how I can think more positive, please let me know.

Sorry to be so miserable.

Thanks
Lucie x

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Re: Feeling very teary

Post by Meggy on Thu Aug 28, 2014 5:31 pm

Lucie I'm so sorry, I believe the way you are feeling is normal for HPTH, I know it was - & is - one of the biggest problems I have. For me realising that it was to be expected was a huge step in coping because I, like you, was turning into someone I didn't recognise. I've said it before but I honestly thought I had early onset alzheimers and was petrified. What are your vitamin D levels like? Mine were below 25 and since taking Vit D tablets I have found that my mind is much sharper and my mood are more stable - of course I now ache like hell! It doesn't everyone but it might be worth checking that out.

The main thing is to keep communicating, we're all here for you x

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Re: Feeling very teary

Post by Lucie83 on Thu Aug 28, 2014 5:35 pm

Hi Meggy

Thank you for your reply. The last time I had my Vitamin D checked it was perfectly normal, another reason why I am a watch and wait case  Crying or Very sad

Lucie x

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Re: Feeling very teary

Post by pilipala on Thu Aug 28, 2014 5:51 pm

Hi Lucie,

Be encouraged that this is the one place that you don't need to apologise for how you feel. This forum is a lifeline. Many of us find it hard to express what's going on in our heads to those around us, so knowing that there's others out there who just get it, means so much.

Last Sept I started getting tearful for no good reason and it went on for several months. I too knew I wasn't depressed and resisted all attempts to be put on anti-depressants. It affected my life far more than a lot of other symptoms because it made me not want to leave the house and I stopped meeting up with people all because I couldn't explain why I was crying and I didn't want to worry people. It drove me mad.

I now put it down to low vit D and my biggest fear is that as soon as the sunshine ends it will start happening again this year. I already feel my energy levels starting to drop further down.

Hmmm, as for coping strategies. I found talking it through with friends didn't particularly help as, like you say, it becomes all-consuming. Distraction was my best tactic, finding other things to focus on. Ironically it was a traumatic family event that actually displaced it from my mind, not recommended though!

Do not beat yourself up about it. You are ill. Your hormones are not right. (I strongly suspect HPT/ low vit D also affects estrogen levels in younger women but I need to do more research) You are allowed to cry, you are allowed to have bad days, you are allowed not to be as 'with it' as you know you normally would be. It is not your fault. Most of all, this will not be forever. There will be better days in the future.

In the meantime we are all here for you.

Love, cyberhugs and cats catcatcat

Dee
xxx

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Re: Feeling very teary

Post by Amanda Lynne on Thu Aug 28, 2014 7:29 pm

Hi Lucie
I'm so sorry you are feeling so down, I understand completely, I have had months of feeling tearful, spaced out and thinking I'm the only one feeling like this.
I worry about everything, my health, my children's health, hubby's health, our business, the future, kids future, the cars, is the roof leaking (it's not and hubby owns a construction company, so why worry ???) the cats health, the cats future and even when I had nothing to worry about I worry about why I'm not worrying.
I do feel anxious a lot but I also realise PTH disease can cause it and it's not my fault. It's a hard circle to break and there isn't any easy answer, you have to be kind to yourself and if you can find something you really enjoy doing, treat yourself and spend some doing it. Mine is watercolour painting, I find I can loose myself and the worry seems to lift. I have one close friend and my twin Sister that I can talk to and release it a bit but even them I don't go into all my concerns.
I'm sure now you have 2 kittens you will be quite busy and cats especially kittens are so gorgeous give yourself time to play with them and enjoy.
You can PM me any time if it helps, I do understand I love you
Lots of love Amanda catcat Xxxx
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Re: Feeling very teary

Post by Kathi209 on Thu Aug 28, 2014 8:09 pm

Lucie sorry your having a rough time, like Amanda said with hyperP  your emotions will be all over the place. From teary to the I could care less to the what ifs. There is really no pill to fix it. We have each other and we all understand what this disease does, so you not alone. We all hope for the surgery cure, we will get there. Hugs Kathi

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Re: Feeling very teary

Post by Lucie83 on Thu Aug 28, 2014 8:12 pm

Thank you all.

Even reading some comments start me off  Sad  so grateful to all of you, it's hard to express how you feel to loved ones. My father-in-law was diagnosed with the 'C' word last year and it knocked us all for six. Fortunately, he's now in remission but it opens your eyes, and of course turned me into a worrying wreck. I'm like you Amanda, if I'm not worrying about something I assume something is wrong!

I poured myself a glass tonight, might help me sleep better without hitting the pillow and having a head full of "what if" worries 

Xxxx

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Re: Feeling very teary

Post by Tigerlily on Thu Aug 28, 2014 8:34 pm

Cheers, Lucie - sit back, relax and enjoy!

Love from Tigerlily xxxx

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Re: Feeling very teary

Post by Brigitte0 on Thu Aug 28, 2014 9:04 pm

I think we all feel as though we are not quite ourselves any more. I barely recognise the person I have become and feel like the real me is just behind me and can't catch up. I have been terribly depressed, especially in the limbo stages, but have been supported and comforted by the people on this forum. I don't really talk to people outside my family about the everyday hassles of coping so the majority of people don't even know and I don't want them to. It's such a relief that everyone here understands so you don't have to pretend you're fine! 

I hope you feel more positive that you've shared your worries and we all care about you and how you're feeling. It can be such a help just to write down here and it's like a gathering of caring friends who understand, help and keep you going.

Sending massive cyber hugs and lots of love
Brigitte xxx
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Re: Feeling very teary

Post by Lucycatnaps on Thu Aug 28, 2014 10:14 pm

Hi Lucie,
I feel I could have written everything that you have mentioned and everyone else's comments as well.  I have some really good weeps at times and my emotions swing all over the place and yet I too know that I am not depressed.  I let it out as bottling it up is worse, and then I feel a bit better for a bit....  I too think that since starting Vitamin D that I do feel a bit more stable but I am dreading the shorter days.  If you don't mind me asking, how old are your little ones??  Is there a playgroup around or a Mums and Toddlers group that you could join?  You are making me jealous with two kittens, they are such fun at that age and so full of beans that they will keep you well and truly occupied.  Curtains was Lucy's favourite when she was little!  We all understand what you are going through and you know there is always someone here that will listen.  
Take care and hope tomorrow you feel a bit better
Hugs Sue
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Re: Feeling very teary

Post by Lucie83 on Thu Aug 28, 2014 10:22 pm

Hi Sue

My 2 are nearly 4 and 5 1/2, both back to school and preschool next week. I've tried some baby groups but without this sounding so harsh, all they want to talk about is weaning, walking, teething, dry nights etc no offence but I want adult conversation tongue I'd rather meet my friends. Sounds harsh but I live in toddler world 24/7. 

Thank you all for the replies, I appreciate and take all on board. The kittens are definitely keeping me entertained!

Night night xx

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Re: Feeling very teary

Post by Lucycatnaps on Thu Aug 28, 2014 10:47 pm

Ohhh Lucie,
I wish you lived nearer to me, with all that free time whilst they were at school I'd have you making both of them a quilt each.  Patchwork and quilting has saved many a soul and it is such good fun and the people are fantastic.  With all the surge in crafting around at the moment there is something for everyone , even if you have never sewn a stitch in your life.  See, you have made me all enthused again, and made me forget my woes for a little while, a glimpse of the old me! Very Happy 
Does your local college do any evening classes in other areas that you might be interested in?  I know it helps to have a change from baby talk!
Hugs Sue x


Last edited by Lucycatnaps on Thu Aug 28, 2014 10:48 pm; edited 1 time in total (Reason for editing : Typo)
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